Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Adios, Baseball


So...yeah...I would vote for Matt Holliday.

I was writing lesson plans for The Crucible this morning (read: contemplating whether or not my life is worth living), and I came to the realization that I kind of already miss baseball. More importantly, since I was in a high school classroom while I was thinking about this, I came to the realization that baseball is sort of like high school for me.

While I was there, I thought everything was incredibly outmoded, self-serving, and boring. The people in charge had their own best interests in mind, most people believe it's a lot worse now than it was in some far-off hypothetical time, and there was no reason it had to take as long as it did to finish. However, just as it was winding down, I started to like it.

Now it's all over, and I am excited to move onto something far more personally appealing and exciting, with more Black people, drinking, and sex. Kind of.


I know what you're thinking. And the answer is yes. I do have a nickname for my penis. It's called The Octagon. But I've also nicknamed my testes. The left one is James Westphal, and the right one is Dr. Kenneth Noisewater. You ladies play your cards right, you might just get to meet the whole gang.

Bonus:

Echoes of "Boom goes the dynamite." [courtesy of With Leather]

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