Thursday, August 14, 2008

Occasions in the Past Week When Tayshaun Prince Has Held His Tongue

1. On the team's day off, Carmelo Anthony bought an armful of kung-fu DVDs at a nearby market. He seemed so excited about the bargain he got on them that Tayshaun didn't have the heart to tell him the discs almost certainly weren't Region 1, and he consequently would not be able to play them on his machine.

2. On the bus to The Bird's Nest venue Tuesday, a conversation about Barack Obama's presidential candidacy began among LeBron James, Dwyane Wade, Chris Paul, and Prince. Tayshaun will be voting for McCain--getting a tax refund of over a million dollars next year gives him quite a charge--but did not want to seem contrarian or stodgy, as the other parties clearly had Democratic leanings. Thankfully, when LeBron made a joke about additions Obama would potentially make to the White House, the subject was changed to the several ways in which Black people are different from White people. (Tayshaun made the following contribution to that line of conversation: "You know how White people put a little bit of mayo on they sandwich, like they don't want it to get all soggy? Black people be puttin' a whole lot of mayo! They just put it all over! They slather it--sandwich gettin' all drenched and shit, drippin' out the other end!" [Paul and Wade laughed; James did not.])

3. Deron Williams stayed in on Tuesday night and watched Cape Fear on HBO in his hotel room. The next day he kept on telling everyone how great Gary Busey had been in it, and that the film was much more suspenseful than he had recalled. Tayshaun figured out pretty quickly that Williams was confusing Busey with Nick Nolte, but he didn't want to seem like a know-it-all.

4. During practice on Monday morning, Carlos Boozer, rather than assessing the situation before putting the ball on the floor, instinctively performed a power dribble when he received a pass in the post, a habit Coach K has been trying to rid him of for years. Coach chastised him playfully by saying, "If you do that one more time, I'm going to have you peeling potatoes in the corner over there like I used to do in the Army." Boozer thought a lot about the statement and got the idea for an invention that would peel a potato with delicacy and speed. He drew up some rough diagrams and ran them by a few of his teammates, who were quite receptive. Michael Redd even recommended a patent attorney for him. Tayshaun seemed to remember such a gadget already existing, but he wasn't sure enough to dash Boozer's hopes. When he returned to the hotel, he looked it up on the Internet. It's called the Rotato.

5. At halftime of the Angola game, Jason Kidd made an unflattering remark about Chinese women's lack of makeup, saying that he had expected quite the opposite from their appearance, all "dolled up with kabuki-type stuff." Tayshaun knew that the style of theater Kidd was referencing was native to the nation of Japan, not the country they were visiting. But earlier, when Kidd had criticized Tayshaun's quiet demeanor as "taking notes with his eyes," Tayshaun knew that he was already on the elder pointguard's bad side, and he preferred not to engender any furter resentment.

1 comment:

Will said...

Wait, Gary Busey and Nick Nolte are different people?